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Finding the funny in family life, just to keep me sane!
The Broken Record Mom
If I had a nickel for every time I’ve said, “Close the door!” “Go get dressed!” or “We don’t eat in our underwear!” I’d probably own a private island by now. But life with a teenager, a tween, a golden doodle, and a husband who sometimes acts like the fourth kid means these phrases are on constant repeat.
Sometimes, in the middle of a rant about brushing teeth or picking up socks, I realize: this is my life now! I’m a human broken record. It’s a little funny… when I’m not losing my mind. And that’s why I write. Humor has become my lifeline in this chaotic, joyful, frustrating mess we call family life.
The Family Cast
- Me (The Mom): The unofficial CEO of chaos management, I’m the one holding this circus together (most days). Between repeating myself a billion times, inventing mnemonics to keep the family on track, and trying to stay sane, I turn to humor and writing as my survival tools. In the moment the stress is real, but later, when I sit down to write, I can turn the madness into stories that make me laugh. I hope you can relate and see that to some extend, we’re all in the same boat.
- The Teenager: Moody but lovable, he is alternating from moments of beautiful brilliance to absolute absurdity. He eats like a snake, devouring huge amounts of food in one sitting and then digesting it for the rest of the day. He seems to live in his underwear and is constantly testing how far he can push the limits. And he is starting to resemble his dad, both in intellect and the occasional habit of talking in a way no one else understands.
- The Tween: The perpetual grazer, he’s always hungry but needs only tiny amounts of food every five minutes. A mix of mischief and sweetness, with wide eyes that can melt your resolve in a second. He’s a rule follower at heart but can and will sneak in just a little rule-bending and then flash an innocent smile that almost makes you forget you are supposed to be mad.
- The Golden Doodle: Despite her name, she is more white than golden. And she loves to turn her fluffy white fur into a muddy masterpiece. But she doesn’t like the shower, so that’s when things become interesting. She keeps things lively and messy. She’s also the family cleanup crew, happily feasting on leftovers: the teenager’s after-dinner scraps and the tween’s abandoned snacks scattered throughout the day and the house.
- The Husband: A genius and funny nerd who completed his PhD on the creation of the universe. My mom likes to say, “The planet is barely big enough for him,” and I think she is right. He often talks in a way that no one can understand, except, perhaps, our teenager, who is turning into a smaller version of him. Whether he’s grumbling like a grumpy old man, dazzling us with hero dad moments, or whipping up chaos in the kitchen, he’s at the center of the madness, and somehow makes it all better.
Why Humor Is Essential
One morning, actually… many mornings, my teenager sat at the breakfast table in his underwear. For the seven billionth time, I sighed and said, “Go get dressed before coming downstairs. We don’t eat in our underwear!” But that one morning, my younger son, sitting there innocently in a T-shirt, looked at me with wide, angelic eyes. And when my teenager grudgingly headed upstairs, my younger son stood up… and that’s when I saw it, he was also in his underwear. They both ran upstairs giggling like it was the funniest joke in the world.
I turned to my husband, desperate. “What am I doing wrong? I say it every morning! How do they not get it?” He avoided eye contact, but I saw the corners of his mouth twitch. Then, before I could interrogate him, he got up to sneak away, wearing a big sweater, a hat, and… no pants.
Nightly Chaos and the Mnemonic Experiment
Every evening, I repeat the same instructions: eat, clean up, shower, clean up, and take the trash out. After saying it a billion times, I turned it into a catchy mnemonic (in French: manger, ranger, doucher, ranger, poubelles!). It rhymes, it’s easy to remember, and I say it like a mantra.
And it works… sometimes. The problem is, when they forget one thing, they forget everything. Sometimes I’m out until 8 p.m., and when I get home, it’s like entering a parallel universe. The kitchen resembles a battlefield, no one has eaten or showered, the trash is overflowing, and the boys are happily glued to their screens like they’ve been there all day.
And my husband? Oh, he’s there too, clicking away at his computer, pretending not to notice the chaos around him. I stare at the scene in disbelief, wondering how everyone has managed to avoid basic survival tasks. It’s as if the mnemonic never existed! Or they collectively agreed to ignore it.
In the moment, I want to scream, and sometimes I do. But I’m learning that the best therapy comes later, when I write about it with humor. This adds the bonus of capturing memories and later laughing about them together. And by sharing these stories with you, fellow moms and CEOs of your own family circuses, I hope to offer a little comfort: you are not alone!
Laughing Through the Chaos
Family life is messy, unpredictable, and often exhausting. But it’s also full of love, joy, and moments so ridiculous they could only happen in your family. Writing about it helps me find perspective and stay sane. Because when all else fails, humor is the best therapy!